They were on the road at first light. Willow knew she hadn't slept much the night before and doubted the others had either. There had been conversation when they started out but as the bustling city gave way to barren landscape, they had fallen silent. As they got closer to where Sunnydale used to be, Willow could feel the others' anxiety melding with hers, creating a fifth entity in the car. It made the roomy sedan feel like a two door compact and the two hour ride from the hotel to crater seemed interminable. Willow was surprised that not much had changed since they'd left a year ago; there was a high wire fence that seemed to be surrounding the crater but no guards posted. The fence was topped with barbed wire but someone had cut away a large section of the fencing near the bottom and there looked to be beer and wine cooler bottles littering the area. The landscape was still barren as they approached the crater, but she could feel the energy of the Hellmouth pulsating. It was as if it were a living, breathing “ thing. It hadn't occurred to her before now that no one seemed to question a whole town disappearing off the face of the earth. Well, no one had questioned them, anyway.
They stopped within several feet of the hole in the fence and exploded out of the car, stretching first then moving things from the trunk into a lopsided pile not far from the edge of the abyss. Once the trunk was unloaded, Giles reached into the backseat and gathered the dozen roses he had placed there. Willow had exchanged looks with Buffy and Xander but the younger people seemed to have no clue as to what Giles was up to. Willow had mentally shrugged figuring she'd find out soon enough and, as she thought about it, roses seemed appropriate for their upcoming endeavor.
“I purchased these at the hotel's gift shop. Take a few,” he said, holding them out. Each of them took some, matching puzzled expressions on their faces as he set the remaining flowers on the hood of the car. Clearing his throat, he explained, “I thought since we were coming to where we'd left so many behind, we could make an offering or have some sort of memorial before we get underway. To honor our fallen friends and . . . fellow shopkeepers.” Giles turned pink as he hemmed and hawed in a decidedly un-Giles-like fashion. “That is, if you'd like to, erm, do that sort of thing.”
Willow was slightly taken aback by the uncharacteristic show of emotion from Giles, and it seemed from their faces that Buffy and Xander were also vaguely unsettled but all three of them nodded and the four of them approached the crater, stopping before they'd reached the edge. There was a pause as none of them seemed to know what to do until Xander, shifting his weight from hip to hip, asked in a voice that seemed too loud in the surrounding silence, “So, are we supposed to say something or do we just, uh, toss them in?”
Giles frowned as he looked at Xander. “I hadn't really planned to but, of course, you may if you'd like.”
Xander muttered an unintelligible response but didn't move to do anything with his flowers except to knock the thorns off their stems with the pad of his thumb.
Buffy took the first step forward and dropped a rose into the abyss, her face tight with emotion. She watched as the rose fell and said quietly, “I miss you, mom.” Moments later, she sent a second rose in after the first, murmuring only, “Spike.”
Xander placed a hand on Buffy's shoulder but said nothing as he stood looking down into the crater that had consumed so much of his life. His jaw clenched and he took several deep breaths before a tear finally slipped free. Trying to be surreptitious, he wiped it away as he took another deep breath and cleared his throat. “Thanks for everything, Ahn,” he whispered.
Giles was the next to step up. Extracting his first rose, he gently tossed it over the edge. “For Jenny,” was all he said before looking down at the rest of the flowers in his hand. He frowned and shuffled his feet uncomfortably before sending them tumbling into the crater with a murmured, “and for everyone else in the blighted town.”
Willow stared down into the hole, unmoving for several moments before she sat down on the uneven ground, lost in her memories of the place. She sat there for several minutes, undisturbed by the others. Gazing at the flower in her hand, Willow prayed to Iris, Juno, Mati-Syr-Zemlya and anyone else who might be listening to bless their endeavor and make it successful. The rose was perfect. In full bloom, the fragrance intoxicating as she breathed deeply, drinking it in. She stood and said quietly, wishing, hoping and praying, “For Tara.”
Only once the flower had disappeared, did she seem to notice the other flower in her hand. She stared at it for a long moment, unsure what to do with it when she was struck with a lightning bolt of revelation. With a serene smile and a feeling of peace she nodded and took a deep breath, tossing the rose into the crater that had buried all of her mistakes but none of her guilt. She watched as the flower silently fell before turning away, looking at the ground. She walked to the jumble of equipment without a word and waited for the others to join her.
Xander jogged over, reaching her before Buffy and Giles. “So, uh, who was that last one for?”
She looked up at him and smiled sadly, fighting back the tears. “It was for Warren.”
“Uh,” he started, then seemed to think better of it and simply wrapped his arms around her, hugging her close to him. The group stayed still and silent for several minutes.
Squeezing Xander before shaking off the negative mood and replacing it with a more positive one, she then turned her attention to Buffy. “If you have any trouble convincing them you're you, tell Tara I said I'd meet her under the big pineapple.” Buffy's brow furrowed but Willow only smiled. “She'll understand.” She handed Buffy the crystal bracelet. “I’ve charmed the stones,” she said. “The red will glow when it's closed, the blue will glow within half an hour of the portal opening and the clear will glow while it's open.” Willow frowned for a moment before adding, “Just remember that the universe's half hour and the watch's half hour are two different things so it's more of an 'ish' than a definite.” She helped Buffy put the bracelet on as she continued, “We can’t leave it open long because we don’t want anything from Sunnyhell to cross over. I’ll open it every two hours and hold it open for five minutes. That should help you time it. The portal will open where you enter so make sure you pay attention to where you drop in.” Willow stopped and looked at her best friend. There were no words to convey how she was feeling. Swallowing the lump in her throat, she grabbed Buffy in a tight hug and said softly, “ Please be safe. It's not that I'm not grateful, I am. But it would definitely not be of the good if we lost you. We're sending you into,” she frowned, “well, we don't know what. So, come back, 'kay?” she said, furrowing her brow in uncertainty.
Buffy hugged her back, nodding into her shoulder. “Don’t worry, Will. I’m coming back and I’m bringing Tara with me. And Angel, if he’s with her “ which should be a barrel of interesting.” They broke apart and Buffy cleared her throat as she squared her shoulders, back to business. “When will you start re-opening the portal?”
“Six hours from now. That should give you plenty of time to find her or them and convince them that you’re you and they’ll be safe. Do you have a watch?” Buffy shook her head sheepishly. Willow looked over at Xander, who took the watch off his wrist and handed it to Buffy. She strapped in on her wrist just above the bracelet. “I told Tara in our last connection what was happening but, if I were in her shoes, I wouldn’t believe anything I said, 'cuz, with the all of us being dead thing. We don't know how they're going to react when they see you.”
Buffy nodded again and picked up the backpack they had packed with food and iced tea. They had decided that Tara and Angel probably had water and some foodstuffs. Willow had seen the cow, so they knew Angel was okay but they assumed fresh fruit had been hard to come by. Slinging it over her back, she looked at her friends. “Wish me luck.”
Willow, Xander and Giles hugged her in response.
“So . . . what do you wanna do tomorrow?” Xander smiled.
“Are you kidding? L.A. . . . we shop,” Buffy responded.
“Oh dear Lord,” Giles chimed in.
“Hey, Tara and Angel are probably going to need clothes and stuff,” Buffy replied. A little defensively, Willow thought, smiling as she began setting up the candles for the portal.
“Willow, don’t forget the truck,” Buffy reminded her.
Willow nodded and re-paced out the dimensions, placing the candles further apart and pouring the sand in a wide circle around them. “You ready?” she asked. She was afraid for her friend but, they’d come too far to turn back now.
“Yeah.” She looked at Giles and Xander. “Are you two ready?”
“Ready as I’ll ever be. Buff, you sure you wanna go it alone?” Xander asked for what seemed like the hundredth time.
“Yeah, Xander, I’ll move faster alone.”
“Okay.” He didn't look happy about it but he didn't force the point.
“Right then. Willow, we’re ready,” Giles said taking his place at the left side of the portal while Xander stood on the right. They both wielded swords, ready to take on anything that might come out of the portal as Buffy went through.
Buffy looked at Willow and nodded. “Wish me luck,” she said again, hefting the scythe as Willow started the incantation.
“Iris, Juno, Mati-Syra-Zemlya
I beseech thee three
to aid in our search
for lost beloveds
Validus copiae copie, ego dico
vobis per imperiosus postulo,
patefacio volatilis vicis via
ut orbis terrarum ego peto
duos errabundus viator domus accerso”
A brilliant light bathed them for an instant. Without a backward glance, Buffy stepped through the portal and was gone as it closed behind her. “Good luck,” Willow whispered. As much as she wanted Tara back, she didn’t want it to be at the expense of her best friend “ the one that was alive and well. Excitement, anticipation and fear were waging war inside her head, chest and stomach, kind of like kamikaze moths battering a bug zapper. And she wasn't sure which one was winning.
“Well, now all we can do is wait,” Giles said, sitting next to Willow and slipping an arm around her shoulders. Xander joined them and took Willow's hand in his. The three of them sat in silence watching the blank space where, a moment ago, Buffy had slipped into the unknown.
Buffy tucked and rolled as she went through the portal. She came up on her feet, scythe at the ready. It was broad daylight and the street was deserted. She made note of where she was. ‘Next to what used to be the Espresso Pump, easy enough,’ she thought, wistfully remembering the hours she and the gang had spent there as she started through the streets of Sunnydale. She shook her head at the rickety sign and wondered who “ or what “ had tried to eat it.
She paused here and there, briefly, as some of the shops brought forth a wave of nostalgia “ especially The Magic Box. It was strange being back here. It was exactly the same except for the rubble and the fact that it seemed completely deserted. Buffy knew better than to believe that. The Hellmouth was still here and open for business. ‘I’m guessing Sunnydale after dark is a little different. Hopefully, that means Tara and I “ and Angel, if he's here “ can escape as soon as I find her. Or them.' As she jogged through town, she noted the destruction; buildings were demolished, burned to the ground or just piles of brick and wood. She was surprised at how little she felt at seeing her former home in ruin. Yes, there was some nostalgia but her overriding emotion was that of relief. Relief that, in her world, she was free of both the place and the responsibility. As she turned onto her old street she thought, ‘almost too easy.’ She hadn’t seen, heard or sensed anything “ evil or otherwise.
She reached the house and hesitated. Should she knock or just walk in? She decided on a combination, knocking as she opened the door calling “Hello?” She was suddenly flat on her back, Angel in full game face on top of her.
“Angel!” Buffy exclaimed, surprised because as much as she'd hoped she'd find him here she hadn't really believed or expected it.
“Buffy?” he hesitated and she took advantage, knocking him off her and coming up with the scythe at the ready.
Angel growled, “Who are you?”
“Angel, it’s me. It’s Buffy,” she said, taking half a step forward, hoping to convince him but not willing to take any chances.
“Buffy’s dead,” he snarled at her, causing her to falter. She could feel the hate coming off him in waves.
Buffy sighed, she'd known this wasn't going to be easy so she tried another tack. “No. You are. Where’s Tara?” she asked, trying to distract him.
Angel just glared at her distrustfully, his game face still on and snarling menacingly.
Buffy looked at him trying to decide what to do. Was Willow wrong? Was she looking at Angelus? “Okay. Willow said she told Tara I was coming. Angel, it’s me.” She was almost begging him to believe her.
“How do I know that?” he growled. “Willow is dead. Everyone is. It’s just me and Tara and I won’t let you hurt her.” He started to advance on her and she took a step back, bringing up the scythe. He stopped and glared at her. They had reached an impasse.
‘Okay, I get through the portal and the town without a problem only to run into a crazy overprotective Angel,’ she thought, her mind racing. 'How bizarro is this?' “Angel . . .” she started.
“What’s going on?” Tara interrupted as she came up behind Angel. Spotting Buffy, her jaw dropped and her eyes widened.
Buffy watched as Tara closed her mouth, jaw tightening and her eyes narrowing in distrust. “Tara?” she whispered. Willow and Dawn had been right. Buffy felt a tear slide down her cheek as relief flooded through her, washing away the stress of the past days and weeks.
Angel was looking menacingly at Buffy. “Stay away from her,” he snarled.
“Willow and Dawn said I’d find you here,” she said ignoring Angel. “I came, but I wasn't sure I believed them. God, Tara, it’s so good to see you.” Buffy was still holding the scythe at the ready, instinct and long habit overriding her relief but she was crying and smiling, unable to believe the blonde witch was standing in front of her.
“How do we know you're not The First?” Angel growled.
“Because you just knocked me on my ass,” she snapped at him. “If I'd been The First, I'd be feeding you to an uber-vamp right now so shut up and let me think.” He looked a little startled but she ignored him.
“Tara, do you remember when you brought me back from the dead? I asked you to find out if I came back wrong. Remember why I thought I did?”
Tara nodded warily, her body language and face impassive, not giving anything away.
“Because of Spike. Because I let him . . .” she blushed and trailed off, turning to Angel and shrugging uncomfortably. “When was the last time you saw me?” she asked.
He eyed her suspiciously. “The night before the big battle.”
“Okay, then you knew about me and Spike. Tara knows that's why I thought I came back wrong. Oh! And remember Spike's 'cramp' at my never-ending birthday party and you stood up to Anya because she was trying to get Willow to use majick again.” Buffy started pacing, wary of Angel but not really paying attention to either of them as she wracked her brain trying desperately to find something, anything, that would convince them.
“Angel, that night, did we talk about cookie dough?” She watched as he nodded, uncertainty playing across his face. “I'm almost done baking, Angel,” she said, hoping he'd remember. From the expression on his face and the way his shoulders tightened, she guessed he did.
She suddenly remembered what Willow had told her to say if Tara didn't believe she was real. She oh-so-casually said, “Willow said to tell you that she'd meet you under the big pineapple. She said you'd know what she meant.” Buffy watched as Tara's face relaxed and her pretty blue eyes filled with tears.
“Buffy,” was all she said before launching herself at the Slayer. Buffy dropped the scythe and pulled Tara into a bear hug. The two young women stood there hugging each other and crying. When they finally broke apart, Tara looked at Angel who still looked ready to kill.
“Angel,” Tara said gently, her arm still around Buffy's waist, “look at her. Clear out the fact that we’ve been barely surviving. Let go of your suspicion and really look at her.”
Angel looked at Tara then relaxed, his game face melting into the face Buffy remembered, if slightly more careworn.
“Buffy?” he asked hesitantly.
Buffy looked at him. Now that he was no longer threatening her, the emotion of actually seeing him again threatened to overwhelm her. Before she knew it, he had engulfed her in a bear hug and was kissing her passionately. She forgot everything else and gave into the kiss, thinking of nothing but Angel and the new opportunity that had just been handed to them.
“But . . . how . . . what . . . I don’t understand,” Angel stammered, something Buffy didn't think she'd ever heard from him. Her Angel, so sure of himself, stammering like a school boy on his first date.
“Well, let me go and I’ll fill you in.” Buffy smiled as Angel let her go. She retrieved the bag from where it had fallen when Angel jumped her and handed it to him as she took Tara by the hand and they walked into the living room. They all sat on the couch and Buffy took the bag back from Angel. Opening it, she took out a bunch of bananas, some apples and oranges, a box of chocolate chip cookies and handed them to Tara along with two still cold bottles of ice tea.
“We thought you might like the fresh fruit and the ice tea just looked good,” she grinned.
While Tara ate, Buffy filled them in. “Okay, so, you guys should know most of the story “ Tara “ you were praying to Iris for help, I guess.” She frowned, trying to remember how Willow had explained it. “At least what Dawn thought was that because of the amazing bond you and Willow share, somehow it crossed dimensions or alternate realities or something,” she said waving her hands vaguely. “You were looking for help and it got the message to the person most likely to be able to help.” She looked from Tara to Angel and shook her head, unable to believe they were really here “ that she was really here. “So we thought it was an illusion demon because we were all having weird daydreamy hallucinations but Willow was having nightmares, not daydreams and then we vanquished the illusion demon but Willow's nightmares hadn't stopped.” She stopped rambling and frowned in thought before continuing. “Oh, yeah,” she said, “that’s how Willow was getting the S.O.S. “ whenever she fell asleep, she got what she called a ‘taramare’. It took forever to figure out what was going on, then, with the research to figure the how, what, why.” She stopped talking and looked at them quizzically. “Why didn’t you know I was coming? Willow said she told you.”
Tara nodded as she swallowed. “Yeah, but we weren’t sure if it was real, you know? I mean, Willow died two years ago. You and the others . . . ” Tara trailed off, swallowing hard and looking like she was trying to hold back tears. “You all died last year. Angel and I have been just surviving. It was a little more believable that a demon or something had figured out we were here and was trying to find us rather than Willow and you and the others were alive and coming to rescue us, you know?” she finished in a hoarse whisper. Shaking her head she looked at Buffy. “I still don't understand. You're dead, you're all dead. We . . . we saw your,” she swallowed hard, still trying to hold back the tears, “your bodies in the wreckage at the high school,” she finished quietly.
Buffy nodded, “Yeah, I get that.” She hesitated a moment before asking, “What happened two years ago?” She wasn't sure she wanted to know but she knew she had to ask. “What happened to Willow?”
Tara bit her lip and swallowed before softly saying, “Stray bullet. One of the geek trio, Warren. He shot you and a stray bullet came through our window . . .” Tara trailed off and closed her eyes as tears started slipping down her face. Reaching out for Tara's hand, Buffy smiled softly at her newly rediscovered friend. Tara smiled her thanks and wiped her tears away. Taking a deep breath, she continued on. “I just shut down. Dawn, goddess, poor Dawnie, found me sitting in the dark holding Willow's body.” Her face contracted in pain and Buffy couldn't imagine how that had hurt Tara. “It took you all hours to get me to let her go,” she whispered hoarsely. “After the funeral, I tried to leave. I just didn't feel I belonged here anymore.” She smiled at Buffy. “You, Xander, and Dawn wouldn't let me. 'We're family, we'll get through this,' you told me.” She ducked her head and lowered her voice. “It was probably the nicest thing anyone's ever done for or said to me, except for Willow.”
Thinking she should be used to life's weird twists and turns and the universe's warped sense of humor, Buffy shook her head and smiled. “Good on me, then. I was right. I'm glad you stayed with us “ er - them.” Buffy was glad, too. She knew it had taken Tara a long time to believe she was part of the “Scooby” family and was glad that her alternate reality self had been able to convince Tara to stay. 'Should make convincing her to move to England a little easier,' she thought.
“Well,” Buffy said, changing the subject, “it took me a lot less time to find you than we thought it would. Willow won't start opening the portal,” she checked Xander's watch and noted that the red crystal was glowing. “For about four hours so we need to be ready to move in three and a half,” Buffy said.
Tara shook her head. “How is this possible?” She kept looking at Buffy like she couldn't believe the Slayer was really there. Buffy could totally appreciate the feeling.
“Willow or Giles could probably explain it better but,” Buffy hesitated for a moment to try and say it right. “There was some sort of break, or rip, in time. The bullet that killed Willow in this reality, killed you in my reality.” She looked apologetically at the pretty blonde wicca when the girl flinched. “One of the witches at the coven said it happens all the time, you know, with different choices and stuff. Angel, remember when Willow's vampire showed up in Sunnydale? It's kind of like that.”
“Willow's vampire?” Tara asked, paling a bit. “I don't remember that story,” she said hesitantly, looking askance at Buffy.
“Long story short: Xander was dating Cordelia, Willow was with Oz. Oz and Cordy caught Will and Xander smooching. Cordy got a visit from Anyanka “ you know, Anya with, like, pms and a gun“ and wishes I had never come to Sunnydale. End result “ vampire heaven. But then Anyanka's power center was destroyed and the wish was void. Anyanka becomes Anya who tries to get Willow to help her retrieve her power center from the alternate timeline. The spell went flooey and we ended up with a vamped out Will from that reality. Okay, so it was a long story medium,” she said, pausing for a breath. “Anyway that's what Terese, the witch at the coven, thinks happened.” Buffy shrugged. “I don't understand it but I guess that's what must have happened 'cause,” she grinned at the two people sitting with her on the couch, “here I am and here you are!”
“Okay. I understand alternate realities but that doesn't explain you being here. I would think, I mean, I don't know but, once a time line diverges it wouldn't converge,” Tara said, confusion written all over her face.
Buffy shrugged. “We're all pretty clueless on that, but it's not really a convergence, exactly. Just kind of,” she frowned trying to think of a way to put it. “Like those crane machines, where you can win a stuffed toy? I'm the crane and you two are the toy prizes, direct from France. We just needed to pluck you out and bring you home. Someone or something for some reason helped your SOS reach Willow,” she said.
“France?” asked Angel, puzzled.
Buffy opened her mouth to explain the analogy but was interrupted.
“I was really connecting with Willow?” Tara asked with a soft smile.
“Yeah. Well, with 'A' Willow “ not really your Willow, but one that's the Willow that split off when you got shot . . .uh . . . when she got shot,” she frowned. “When whichever one of you got shot,” she sighed, frustrated with her inability to explain the science-y stuff as well as Will. She gave up and shook her head before continuing. “Gave her a pretty fair wiggins, too,” Buffy said with an equally soft smile. “Every time she fell asleep you were there telling her to keep her promise.”
Tara shook her head. “I don't even know what the promise is,” she said.
“She said it was when she reversed Glory's mind suck on you “ you told her you got so lost and . . .” Buffy started to say but Tara interrupted.
“She said, 'I found you. I will always find you.' I remember.” Tara's voice was a whisper.
Buffy watched the emotions play across Tara's face. She wasn't sure what was going through Tara's mind but it suddenly struck her how deep the love between Willow and Tara had to be. She shook her head in amazement.
“Willow's doing majick again,” Tara said quietly, her voice flat and her face falling. It wasn't a question.
'Oh, boy,' Buffy thought. “Tara, so much has happened. Yes, Willow's doing majick again but she's okay. I “ we knew you'd have a lot of questions but I need you to trust me.” Buffy took both of Tara's hands in hers and looked the tired girl in the eyes. “She's okay but I think you should talk to her, you know?” she said, hoping Tara would be okay with waiting to hear it from Willow. Buffy really didn't think she should be one to tell Tara everything Will had done and gone through.
Tara nodded. “I understand that.” She hesitated a moment before she seemed to come to a decision. “Is she . . . is there anyone . . . special? I-I'm s-sorry. I sh-shouldn't have asked.” Tara's face was flush with embarrassment and she ducked her head, letting her hair fall into her face.
Buffy smiled and mentally crossed her fingers then uncrossed them. Willow currently had no relationships with anyone except with her Dream Tara. Last week didn't matter anymore. “No. There isn't.” Tara looked up at Buffy. “There's a lot you two will have to talk about and work out, but that much I can tell you.”
Tara ducked her head again but not before Buffy saw the smile Tara was trying to hide. 'Stellar,' she thought, smiling to herself, 'she's still in love with Willow,' she thought, 'that should make some stuff easier.'
“What about the others? Xander, Anya, Dawn, Giles . . . everyone?” Angel asked, moving forward, forcing Buffy to let go of Tara's hands and back away out of politeness. Buffy got the feeling he was trying to deflect her attention from Tara and smiled inwardly at his protectiveness toward the blonde witch. There was the Angel that she missed. She decided to let it go for now and they spent the next two hours filling each other in on the rest of the two years they'd been separated and comparing notes on the differences of the last year. They discovered the two biggest differences were the scythe and the amulet Spike had worn. Neither had been found in Tara's reality.
“Oh, my God! The scythe and the amulet were the keys to saving us. We'd have been massacred.” Buffy was incredulous. She jumped up and went to retrieve the scythe from where she had dropped it. When she came back into the living room, Angel and Tara gaped at it.
“Nifty toy, Buff,” Angel said. “Where'd you get it?”
“The scythe is an ancient weapon,” she explained to her two friends. “Willow used it as a way to give every potential slayer the slayer skills. That gave those of us in the battle the edge we needed to hold the Turok-han off until the amulet did its thing.” She frowned. “The amulet channeled the sun's energy through Spike and dusted all the Turok-hans and pretty much destroyed the town. There's no way we'd have been able to win otherwise,” she said, shaking her head.
“Wow. Well, that explains a lot,” Tara said, exhaling with a whoosh of air.
“We still have two hours before Willow opens the portal,” Buffy said. “You two should try and get some rest.”
Angel nodded and gathered up their books before leading Buffy downstairs with Tara coming down behind them, whispering some kind of incantation. In a moment, the basement was bathed in a warm pinkish light. “What's that?” she asked.
“I ward the door every night to hide Angel and me from anyone who might wander near the house. It camouflages the door so it looks like a wall. The light is a fairy light spell, it's the only way we can see after dark,” Tara explained.
Buffy nodded at the explanation.
“You can have my cot, Buffy,” Angel said. “I'm not big on sleeping.”
“I'm not going to sleep,” she replied. “I'm not the one who's been in hiding.”
“Well, then I'll keep you company.” He smiled at her.
“Okay.” She smiled. Some private time with Angel, not a bad thing.
Tara lay awake on her cot listening to Buffy and Angel's murmured conversation. They were quiet enough that she could sleep . . . except she couldn't. The emotions and thoughts ricocheting through her wouldn't allow it. She would see Willow soon. Her emotions were conflicted. Excitement warred with anxiety. She wanted to see Willow but, what if there was nothing there between them anymore? What if they couldn't reconnect? Buffy said Willow wasn't with anyone. That had made her happier than she wanted to admit. She hadn't been with anyone since she'd lost Willow. Not that Kennedy hadn't tried. She'd been so tempted. Kennedy was a pretty girl and Tara had been lonely. Ultimately, though, that's why Tara hadn't pursued Kennedy's flirtations. There were a lot of reasons to get involved with someone but loneliness wasn't a very good one. She also hadn't wanted any distractions from her majick studies.
Tara sighed. Willow was doing majick again. She was unsure how she felt about that. Buffy had said it was okay but . . . 'No. I won't think that way,' she thought, quelling the idea that Willow was manipulating people with majick. But . . . she shook her head. Two years was a long time and so much would have changed. 'Except the way I feel about her,' was Tara's last conscious thought before the exhaustion claimed her.
She was in Willow's arms and Willow was kissing her. It was sweet and tender and Tara never wanted it to end. When they finally parted, Tara pulled back and looked at Willow. Tara was mesmerized by Will's huge black eyes. 'Willow's eyes are green,' Tara thought, suddenly frightened. She ran away as fast as she could, Willow's voice ringing in her ears. “Tara, Tara,”
“Tara, come on, wake up. It's time to go.” Buffy's voice roused her from her nightmare.
“What?” she asked groggily.
“Time to get gone,” Buffy said.
Tara nodded, then hesitated. She didn't want to ask but the nightmare was still fresh. “Buffy . . .”
“Yeah?”
“You're, uh, s-sure? I-I m-mean . . .”
Buffy smiled. “It'll be good. It'll be hard but good. She still loves you.”
“B-but the m-majicks. Are y-you s-sure? I m-mean . . . c-could you be under a s-spell?”
Buffy shook her head. “No. Definitely not. Trust me.”
Tara looked at Buffy for a long moment. Her aura hadn't changed much. More sadness maybe, but she was still Buffy. If Willow was working a spell on her, it wasn't leaving a trace. She nodded. “Okay. Let me get Miss Kitty. Everything else is already in the truck.”
“Oh “ in the bag I brought “ there's a soft sided kitty carrier in there. Easier for Miss Kitty transport.”
Tara nodded and looked around the basement that had been her home for the last year. Since Angel's encounter with the Kalderash Clan, they had steadily packed everything they'd wanted into the truck and the basement looked barren. The cots and food were all that remained to indicate anyone had been here. She would not miss any of this.
Scooping up Miss Kitty she said, “Let's go,” and followed Buffy up the stairs.
When they reached the kitchen, Tara found the cat carrier and put Miss Kitty into it. Her dream was still disturbing her but she pushed it away. She was going to see Willow. Today. 'Wait, something's wrong,' she thought. “Where's Angel?” she asked.
“He's in the trailer. I went out and moved things around so he could get in there. Is there anything else you need? Anything else you want to take with you?”
Tara looked around thoughtfully. “No. Everything we needed and wanted was in the basement.”
“Okay. You ready?”
Tara nodded. “Let's go. Oh, wait, Ethel . . .” she didn't want to leave the cow tied up.
“Angel had me put her in the trailer,too,” she grinned, “he said you'd never forgive him if he left her here.”
Tara grinned back. “He's right,” she said. “Okay. I'm ready,” Tara said as she left the house for the last time.
The trip out of Sunnyhell was as uneventful as the trip in. The few demons they saw on the way out ignored them as they headed to the Espresso Pump.
“There was no problem getting to you guys either,” Buffy said.
“Daylight seems to keep the meaner demons away.” Tara shrugged. “Nighttime is a different story.” No, she definitely wasn't going to miss any of this.
They were nearing The Espresso Pump. Buffy stopped the truck and glanced at her wrist and Tara noticed a crystal bracelet with a glowing blue stone. “This is the right spot.” Buffy said. “Now, we wait. Will should open the portal soon.”
The words were no sooner said when there was a flash of light and the portal loomed before them. Buffy looked at Tara and smiled encouragingly. Then she hit the gas, leaving Sunnyhell far behind.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*